Lately, there has been a surge in questions, concerns and downward negative comments towards the admins of Toronto Mommies. I would like to shine some light on the secret life of an admin and maybe, just maybe, change people’s opinions just a little bit.
• Admins are referees! Not a day goes by without a controversial topic appearing and collecting more than 200 comments. The usual offenders are vaccinations, religion, circumcision and sex. And even though it is highly entertaining, it always falls on an admin to keep the peace between mommies that have absolutely no interest in remaining civil. It’s like attempting to solve a years-long territorial Conflict on a daily basis.
• Admins are psychologists! It is not an easy feat trying to keep 3,800 mothers happy, conflict-free and friendly all in one place. Admins argue between each other on a daily basis about what is right and what is wrong; what is ethical and what is excessive. We try our best to remain objective and trustworthy. Moreover, we keep our members confidentiality and offer advice. When we see someone in pain or in trouble, we go above and beyond trying to help.
• Admins are bouncers! There is nothing more exciting that waking up to 10 posts that cannot be approved and need to be addressed individually. We now have a deep appreciation for bouncers, as we know how it feels trying to explain to people that they cannot be accepted because their posts do not follow group rules or that they cannot be members of Toronto Mommies, because they are not mommies… not from Toronto… or not women to begin with.
• Admins are politicians! We want you to like us! Really, we do! We try our best to offer you services that would benefit you. We arrange meetings and networkings. We support our members and agitate others to join us. But as politicians, we have to make tough decisions as well. We need to draw boundaries and follow through on rules. Our job is to keep you rooting for us and it is not always an easy task.
• Admins are volunteers! WE. DO. NOT. GET. PAID. FOR. DOING. THIS. We work between 10-30 hours a week doing what we do. We monitor posts, we approve members, we write blog posts, we keep up with 2 pages, we arrange meetings, we offer advice, we meet with vendors, we supply raffle gifts, and we keep up with the news. We do NOT get paid for doing this.
• Admins are public figures! We get scrutinized, talked about, critiqued, judged and booed. We have to look nice, talk nice and be nice. It is pretty hard to be nice 100% of the time. And when we fail – we are judged so much harder.
• Admins are People. Now, taking into account all of the above, we are also people. We make mistakes, we lose our temper, we get tired and overworked. We are also working mothers on top of being admins. We have reports to write and lullabies to sing, husbands to feed and dirty floors to mop. We also have our hobbies and interests. And we, just like everyone else, only have 24 hours in a day and 2 hands.
It is hard to make everyone happy and it is almost impossible to be liked by everyone, but if you keep in mind that we are, first and foremost people, mothers, women – maybe, just maybe, we will be understood just a bit more.